The Mini

My mom thinks I’m half nuts. (That’s debatable, but we won’t go there…)

The Mini, as it’s known to us locals (hehe), is a half marathon/enormous event that takes place in downtown Indy each year. It draws thousands upon thousands to run it or walk it. The route takes you from downtown Indianapolis, out to Indianapolis Motor Speedway, around the track, and back, while taking in several of the best sites the city has to offer.

The Mini has been something that has always been on my bucket list. I think it’s the coolest thing since sliced bread, as being an avid race fan and Hoosier, it’s seen as something that kicks off the best month in all of Indiana (and maybe the world, in my opinion), May.

I’ve always wanted to run the Mini, but never been in any shape to. I’m not saying I’ll run it, as I’m just not a runner, but the call was put out on Facebook by a friend of mine, another avid female motorsports fan, that she wanted someone to do it with her. She has walked it before, with no preparation and quite a bit of soreness, but wants to do it again with training. We’ve both agreed to walk it next May (2013), as it’s my first time. I’ll be honest, I’m scared as hell.

I’ve never prepared for something like this. I know it’s just walking, but its 13.1 miles worth of it! I have walked 5k’s before, and can walk 2 miles at least a night without fatigue. I have a long ways to go, but I think it's the closest shape I've been in for something like this. (That's not saying much, though.)

It’s a goal I have my eyes on. I just pray this doesn’t turn out like my New Year’s resolution, as I’m still 2-3 sizes away from single digit pants with 7 months to go. It’s something I have to put my mind to, but as my mother always reminds me, if I get an idea in my head I can do something, I won’t stop until it’s done.

“A dream doesn’t become reality through magic; it takes sweat, determination, and hard work.” – Colin Powell

Emotionally Trainwrecked

Ah, emotions. As humans, they drive us. With me this is no different, especially when it comes to eating.

According to the Mayo Clinic: “Emotional eating is eating as a way to suppress or soothe negative emotions, such as stress, anger, fear, boredom, sadness and loneliness. Both major life events and the hassles of daily life can trigger negative emotions that lead to emotional eating and disrupt your weight-loss efforts.”

Yep, that sounds about right.

My mother always tells me without fail, how much I wear my heart on my sleeve, whether I think I’m hiding my emotions or not. If I’m having a bad day, she can tell. It’s supposedly written all over my face. I might as well wear it on my plate too.

I’ve always been one to take out my emotions with food. It’s the only way I know/knew how to cope. Emotional eating, and bored eating too, is something that helped catapult me to 250 lbs in no time flat. When I’m overwhelmed or stressed, I get into that “I don’t care” mood. I’m like a train that’s jumped the track heading for a platform full of people.

That brings me to yesterday. After a few weeks of no pop, I caved. Twice. With Nutter Butters attached.

I tried to “stop the bleeding” as a friend put it, but I didn’t care. Two nights ago I came home in a foul mood from work. Again, I didn’t care. Went to grab Mexican food that night with my husband and completely jeopardized a whole week of hard work and almost 3 lbs. of weight loss. I came up short and only lost a pound and half. I knew, and I told myself before we left, don’t do it. Don’t go, just eat at home; it would have been cheaper anyway. I knew it was going to be bad. But in my stubborn, half-minded haze, I asked, “who cares?”

So this brings me to some tips. This is probably more for me than it is to you, the reader, but emotional eating is something I desperately need help on, and want to be able to curb the crash during those, “I don’t care” moments.

Below are some helpful tips included in the article, “Emotional Eating: Feeding Your Feelings,” by Heather Hatfield, posted on WebMD.com:

· Recognize emotional eating and learn what triggers this behavior in you.
· Make a list of things to do when you get the urge to eat and you're not hungry, and carry it with you, according to the Tufts Nutrition web site. When you feel overwhelmed, you can put off that desire by doing another enjoyable activity.
· Try taking a walk, calling a friend, playing cards, cleaning your room, doing laundry, or something productive to take your mind off the craving -- even taking a nap, according to the Tufts Nutrition web site.
· When you do get the urge to eat when you're not hungry, find a comfort food that's healthy instead of junk food. "Comfort foods don't need to be unhealthy," says Wansink.
· For some, leaving comfort foods behind when they're dieting can be emotionally difficult. Wansink tells WebMD, "The key is moderation, not elimination." He suggests dividing comfort foods into smaller portions. For instance, if you have a large bag of chips, divide it into smaller containers or baggies and the temptation to eat more than one serving can be avoided.
· When it comes to comfort foods that aren't always healthy, like fattening desserts, Wansink also offers this piece of information: "Your memory of a food peaks after about four bites, so if you only have those bites, a week later you'll recall it as just a good experience than if you polished off the whole thing." So have a few bites of cheesecake, then call it quits, and you'll get equal the pleasure with lower cost.
· Lastly, remember that emotional eating is something that most people do when they're bored, happy, or sad. It might be a bag of chips or a steak, but whatever the food choice, learning how to control it and using moderation are key.

In the same article, Jane Jakubczak a Registered Dietician at the University of Maryland, is quoted stating that “75% of overeating is caused by emotions, so dealing with emotions appropriately is important.” Obviously my emotional eating is a work in progress. A major work in progress. I never really understood the point of tracking your hunger during the day, along with the food you eat, but it makes sense. Hopefully these tips can assist you as much as I hope. We aren’t perfect, and I certainly know this is one area I want to focus on.

“Concentrate all of your thoughts upon the work at hand. The sun’s rays do not burn until brought to a focus.” –Alexander Graham Bell

The Shrinking Woman

When I started in April of 2010, I would have never of dreamed I would get this far, not by a long shot. My first goal was to just get 50 lbs off of me, to get back to 200. It seemed so daunting. I’d been there, never thought I’d get over it, but wanted to get back to it. It’s the weight I held when I met my now-husband.

But I can proudly say, I’ve blown past 50! I’m up to 70 now, with 30 to go. I want to hit that 100 lb mark so bad, but have lost my way in some aspects, and am running after the wagon. (See previous posts.) I do have to admit though; I’ve been cracking down, disciplining myself. I’ve started to move more, like I used to, and that seems to help. Official weigh in is on Wednesday mornings, but I like what I’ve seen both yesterday and this morning from this past week’s achievements.

But this post isn’t about the numbers, it’s about inches, and then some. A family member/personal fitness guru/Zumba Queen (I still miss your classes, Lisa!), once told me, “Even if the numbers aren’t there, check your inches. You may not lose numbers that week, but you will see inches come off.” Boy is that true!

I know that with weight loss, you shrink. Duh! But where you lose inches can be some of the weirdest places, and I’m seriously not kidding. For instance, I’ve always had fat fingers. I think my class ring from senior year is a 9 1/2. When I got married, my ring was sized at 9 3/4. Recently, I had to get my ring re-sized to an 8. AN 8!!! (Never in my right mind did I think my fingers would ever be an 8!) And I will be honest; I think I’m going to have to get it re-sized again, soon. I didn’t want to get it resized half way through, to wait until I’ve shed what I wanted to, but I couldn’t take it any longer.

I’ve also found my ankles and wrists have shrunk. I used to not be able to wear ankle bracelets, or had to make sure to find the type that had extenders attached. I ended up donating a pair of cowboy boots I could perhaps wear now, as they wouldn’t zip up around my ankles of calves. (I’m regretting that decision, as I loved those boots and never in my life thought I’d be back to the point I could wear them again. Hindsight is always 20/20.)

This brings me to the too-much-information portion of this post. Just a little warning, as I’m not sure I can put this really any more delicately. When I say everything shrinks, EVERYTHING shrinks. I’m at the point I’m going to have to replace my skivvies… again, and I’m okay with it! (My drawers are saggin’ and I’m always up for shopping!) ;)

Regardless of whether it’s TMI (Too Much Information) or not, it’s an amazing feeling to find clothes that fit again. If you recall my very first blog post, part of my turning point was not able to find anything cute to wear to work, and it really ate away at my confidence and self-esteem. I left in tears that night, and it was time I did something.

I’m nowhere near where I want to maintain, but at this point, I can’t complain. I’m healthier than I have been in at least 6 years (and even at a lighter weight before, my diet was downright awful). It’s been a huge life change that I’m sure I haven’t realized the full impact of just yet.

This whole journey has opened up so many figurative doors (and windows to climb out of, if needed); it’s building my self-esteem and confidence back up from a somewhat depleted state, it’s helped me run and play with my niece and nephew with no problems of keeping up, but most importantly, it’s helping me find me. In all of the gains, the slip ups, the “feedback,” there are also losses, non-scale victories, and triumph. It’s a really rewarding experience. I just have to stay focused and keep my eye on the prize.