That's really all I can say about my latest decision. I know it's for the better, at least temporarily, but I'm super bummed, as I was really looking forward to my "newest" adventure.
As much as it really sucks, I decided that while working through Couch to 5k, putting skate lessons on hold. is probably for the best. I don't want to kill myself between two activities (or at least in one of them). In addition, there are a few factors, none of which really made me comfortable, but I'm really trying to not use this as an excuse to not do it. (Man up, Ash. You got this...right? RIGHT?!)
Factor A: There was a STRONG possibility I would learn to skate with 6 year olds. (I can hear you laughing.)
- This makes me insanely uncomfortable. At least in a class with other adults, we could laugh at each other when we fell. Having a six year old point and laugh as you bust your a## on the ice? I'll take a rain check... Even at my age, that can scar a person. (During the summer, obviously there aren't many students on campus, so there is a chance classes could be combined to make the most of lessons. In this instance, as classes are divided by skating ability in different levels, I seriously could have been mixed in with attendees anywhere from 6 year old kiddos to adults. It was a crap-shoot for the summer; one that I think I may just wait until the Fall or Winter semesters, depending upon my class schedule. At least then I quite possibly could learn to skate with someone nearer to my age.)
- ...especially when $45 race fees are nonrefundable, and I do have a goal to work towards. Have I mentioned before how clutzy and off-balance I am? No, no, I'm being serious... After my first season of winter guard as a 7th grader, my mom and dad both came up to me, and I quote, "Wow Ashley! I can't believe you were so...so.... graceful!? That couldn't have been you... Really, who'd you pay to put in your place?" (You can still ask my mother about it. She will be glad to attest...) I'm also known as that girl that falls up stairs. That takes real talent, folks. ;)
- I'm getting much better as I grow up and mature as an adult, facing fears both personally and professionally (*ahem* public speaking), but I used to be the worst at social situations. I get reaaaaalllly nervous when trying something new, something I haven't done before, in a new environment, around people I haven't met before, especially if it's something that requires a certain skill set. I'm not confident in myself (see blog #1) and I always feel like I have something to prove, if I'm going all in. If I don't, I'll fail, so why chance it? Just take the safe way out and run. Fast. Of course this is something that has changed for the better through this weight loss journey and I'm thankful for that. But my fear of being in a group, not with a personal trainer or someone one-on-one isn't something I'm comfortable with as much as I'd like to be, so of course I need to give myself another pep talk or two before diving in.
- A winter or two ago, I skated (more like hobbled) during an open skate at Pepsi Coliseum in Indy, as it was deserted. Can't make a fool of myself too much if I'm the only one on the ice in the entire arena, right?! I was sore for 3 days. THREE DAYS! For just 20 minutes of hobbl-err, skating. It is my hope, that with C25K and running, I can build some muscle-base in my legs so that I will have better stability, balance, and general comfort when learning to skate. I'm obviously going to be using my legs (a lot) so this to me is something that is a great first step that's needed. (I'm no genius, but have you seen some of the legs of hockey players?! Yeah...about that...)
I will keep you updated as to when lessons may begin in the Fall or Winter. Until then, I'll keep running and working toward other goals as another step in the path to this goal.
No comments:
Post a Comment