Showing posts with label Emotional Rollercoaster. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Emotional Rollercoaster. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 6, 2014

OneAmerica 500 Festival Indianapolis Mini Marathon Race Recap

There's so much I want to say about this past Saturday's half marathon, my first, but I'm not sure where to start or even really how to put everything in words.

I'm not sore, nor was I at really any point after the race aside from what felt like a shin splint in my right leg and the tendon I tweaked a few weeks ago just letting me know it was still there. But nothing hurt. That's it. That's the only soreness I had from 13.1 miles of sheer enjoyment.

The race was amazing, much more than I ever expected. ...but first, let me back up, as I've got two days of Indy-goodness to talk about!

I decided to take the entire day off from work on Friday so that I could rest, get a last minute chiropractic adjustment, clean the house, prep myself for what's about to happen, calm my nerves (or so I thought), and just "chill." Mr. K came home from work, and off to Indy we went!

We decided to go straight downtown to the Indiana Convention Center instead of checking in to the hotel first, to check out the expo and pick up my race packet. What I didn't expect were the nerves and the flood of apprehension that poured over me as we drove in and parked. It was as if it were a bit of panic. (Other runners, is this normal for your first big race?)

After I picked up my packet, we decided to head to the hotel, grab some dinner, come back and just chill. As I unpacked my race clothes to pin my number on my shirt ahead of time, the flood of panic hit me. I forgot to pack a sports bra. (Insert: Facepalm.)

I knew I laid it out with my outfit. I had everything laid out a few days ahead of time just so I didn't wear what I wanted to wear on Saturday during my last training run Thursday. I seriously thought it was the end of the world, and poor Mr. K heard it all... Luckily, in deciding to stay outside of downtown, Target was just down the road! So after we were back from dinner, after I already threw on PJs to chill for the rest of the evening, we made a mad dash down the road, again, so I can buy a last minute, ahem, necessity.

Getting up Saturday morning, I was nervous. I didn't sleep well the night before, even if everything I've read suggests a runner should do otherwise. I was too anxious, too excited, and too giddy, but also apprehensive approaching race day.

We grabbed breakfast at the hotel, loaded up, and headed downtown. We arrived early, right before the start of the first wave at 7:45, and just kind of hung out until my wave at 8:45. It was brisk, and I made sure to keep a light jacket over a long sleeve shirt, over my tee shirt, with shedding each layer to get accustomed the closer to the start.

At this point, I want to thank Mr. K for all that he did for me Saturday. He's a trooper. He stood in the cold with me, held all of my crap, waited on me for over 2 1/2 hours after I started running (that doesn't include before or after the actual race), and dealt with a long line of other spectators wanting to get breakfast at Panera after ducking away from Steak N Shake as the line was down the block. Poor guy. And just for the record, he doesn't do cities very much either folks, all while trying to understand why I'm crazy enough to run 13.1 miles with 33,000+ other runners. I truly have a fabulous and amazing husband.

...shortly before the fun began, I met these two guys, as they started the race basically beside me as our wave took off. One was named Kyle, unfortunately I didn't grab the gentleman's name to the right of this picture, but they are two soldiers who completed 13.1 miles of craziness with their military boots on their feet and their gear packs weighed down, as they were prepping for a training exercise here in a few weeks. All I could do was thank them, in addition to explaining to them how much of rockstars they truly are. I'm still in awe of them, and if I ever get the chance to, I will buy them a beer for both their service to their country (and the reason I can run free), while also for their accomplishment at the Mini. It was truly incredible. (Thanks for the inspiration guys!)


As we started the race heading west of downtown, I'm not going sugarcoat it, but we ran through some questionable neighborhoods that I wouldn't normally run or drive through alone. During daylight. It was really set up nice though, all along the course, as there was plenty of entertainment, plenty of action, plenty of water stops, and plenty of people-watching to keep me entertained in addition to my newly loaded playlist.

...and after mile 3, I just sort of fell into a groove. Most of the race from mile 3 on was a blur. At least until we rolled through downtown Speedway, Indiana. I knew I had to be getting close to Indianapolis Motor Speedway (the one section of the race I have looked forward to since before I began my weight loss journey, the one reason this race was firmly planted on my bucket list), since we started passing both the Dallara Indy Car Factory and the one driver (now owner) who I've looked up to, especially during my teenage years as she ran laps around IMS, Sarah Fisher Hartman Racing's new facility.



...and then off in to the distance, the turn 1 grandstand opened up, along with the famed IMS Pagoda.

I could tell I was getting giddy. I wasn't nervous, I was excited, almost spastic to be honest, as I started to speed up.

As we made the turn on to 16th Street to head towards IMS, I knew we were getting close. I know how to get to the track; I've been there a dozen times for various things, but even as the tunnel entrance came in to view, I almost couldn't stand it.


I still have chills thinking about making the 2 1/2 mile lap around the track, but even more so, from seeing the grandstand and front stretch open up as I ran out of turn 4 and on to the straightaway. Pit entrance greeted me as the Pagoda was firmly planted on my left, with the scoring pylon lit up as it is throughout the month of May.

As I approached the yard of bricks (hence the nickname "Brickyard"), I made my way to the left, where most were kneeling down to stop, kiss the bricks, take a photo opp if they so chose, then continued on. I did just that (without the photo opp). It was the dirtiest, but one of the best kisses a motorsports fan could ask for. ...and the whole time, the only thing I could think of was, "if these walls could talk."


As soon as I crossed the bricks, I had 5.1 miles to go. (Side note: I love how the start/finish line at IMS is one of the mile markers. Kind of nerdy, but kind of neat!)

The last 3-4 miles were pretty uneventful as well, winding back through some more questionable neighborhoods I ran through on my way out to IMS, but as I approached downtown, I knew I had to be getting close. I could see the skyline I love so much getting closer with every step I took.

That last mile, though... Oof. I could definitely tell I started to run out of steam even though I didn't slow down and kept a good pace the entire way.

But as I approached the finish line, everything from the start of my weight loss journey, until my goal of running the Mini Marathon came full circle.

You see, one of the main reason I began my weight loss was because of my Opa. (You can read about that more in my very first blog post here.) He's also the one main reason I'm such a big motorsports fan, a fan across many spectrum and disciplines of the sport. Each year, for as long as I can remember, I've found myself at his place on Memorial Weekend, and even though we're "blacked out" living in Indiana, and not able to watch the Indianapolis 500 live, we take it old school. We listed to the race live via FM radio, crowded around the kitchen table, jumping when a wreck happens, cheering when our favorite driver or "driver of choice" wins such a prestigious race. It's something I'll certainly remember for the rest of my life.

...and as I approached the finish line of the Mini Marathon, I heard the same broadcast I heard sitting around my Opa's kitchen table years back, listening to Michael Andretti battling it out for 1 and 2 in the closing laps of the Indianapolis 500. It's all I heard over my earbuds. I crossed the finish line thinking of my Opa, not the race I just ran, with chills going down my spine.

Everything over the past four years came full circle. 



As soon as I paused the run, grabbed my medal, grabbed a bottle of water, and headed to the Runners' Services exit, I found Mr. K peeking out from behind a few other folks waiting for friends to arrive.

I grabbed him, hugged him, and cried.

Everything just came pouring out.

After gathering myself, I checked my phone. I had sooooooo many notifications, so many text messages (and a missed call from my momma) from friends who had been tracking me via website every time I hit a split. That was another really cool moment. Friends had posted to my Facebook wall cheering me on, encouraging me as I crossed the 5K split, and telling me to keep going after crossing the bricks. I am truly blessed to have each and every person in my life, and the outpouring of support and encouragement from Saturday is truly amazing and humbling.

To each and every one of you, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

(I do want to apologize to friends for not getting back to you while I was running. As a general rule, I ignore my phone when I'm out on runs and Saturday was no different, tuning out the world to de-stress, and usually just pay attention to two things: cars and calls.)

I called Dave, a local radio DJ, runner, and a very, very helpful seasoned veteran of the Indy Mini, and now someone I look up to for running-motiviation and inspiration, to meet up with him, as he wanted to get a picture with me post-race and check on how it went. Aside from totally forgetting to take a picture with him (we both blame it on the lack of sugar in our bodies), I had the opportunity to congratulate him for making the 500 Club. That is an awesome accomplishment, and I'm so proud of you Dave! I told you that you would rock it!

All in all, it was an awesome weekend, and aside from a touch of stomach flu hitting me about two hours after the race was over going in to recovery mode (and the fact I told Mr. K never again twenty-two times), I had an absolute blast!


Would I do it again? Yes! While I'm not sure I'll train again for a half marathon during a semester, I do want to do it again. Just not for a while. You know how a couple puts almost all of their time and energy in to a wedding to only crash and burn shortly after, because the wedding and not the actual marriage was all they thought about? That's kind of how I feel... I'm kind of at the "what now?" point.

I do plan to continue running, I'm certainly not stopping, but I think, at least for the rest of this year, I'll continue to run 5K's, as I have a bit of fun with them! I want to improve my minute per mile time, but I'm not focusing on just that. I also want to get back to lifting weights, improving my tone, and building muscle to become stronger.

...and I also want to continue the "City by Shoes" trends. You can look for that some time after Memorial Weekend. Let's just say, this will be one of the very first years I won't be in Indiana for the Indianapolis 500... :)

Thursday, March 27, 2014

Can't I Just Stay Healthy? Pretty Please?!

The Universe's answer?

No.

I've never been so aggravated and upset this week, and this honestly tops the irritation I had knee surgery. Why? Because I'm 6 weeks out to the Mini Marathon, SIX, and I have my hotel reserved, goops bought, new shoes, outfit planned, etc.

I've been pretty much bawling my eyes out all week.

So what happened?

I decided to push my scheduled runs off by a day, since Monday night I didn't get home until 9:30. I didn't exactly want to be on the treadmill running 5 miles until 11:30 at night so I decided to go to bed, push it off until Tuesday, and use the gym at the university I attend. I did just that.

While running my scheduled 5 miles on Tuesday night, something in my right foot (totally different leg than the knee I had operated on) started to hurt. My first reaction was, "Ok. Just see if it's a muscle spasm. Run it out. Push through"

Ha! Yeah... Right...

At mile 4 I couldn't take it anymore. I had a pain in the top of my foot, a little off center, that started to throw my running gait off. The only thing different I had done was bump up the speed a bit, however it was only by .1 or .2 of MPH to where I was at 5.5. I was able to maintain it for 4 miles, so why at 4 did my foot start to hurt?

I've done the usual - RICE (Rest, Ice, Compress, Elevate), while also downing Ibuprofen and using Rexall like it's going out of style. I'm trying to keep it loose, by rotating my ankle, flexing it every so often, etc. But I've narrowed it down... I think... (Because I have MD after my name; didn't you know that?!)

It's either one of two things:

  1. Stress Fracture
  2. Tendon/strain/muscle ache

I really, really, really, really, really it's the second option, as the only way to heal a stress fracture is to stop and let it heal.

With 6 (SIX) weeks left until the Mini Marathon...

You have got to be f*cking kidding me.

My thought process is this - that if it were a stress fracture, I wouldn't be able to walk. At times it hurts, at times it aches, at times it doesn't. That leads me to believe it's more of a muscle strain or tendon issue.

I'll be seeing a doc tomorrow to see what I should probably do, but honestly, I'll take a Cortisone shot for one in the foot, please! Just let me get through May 3 healthy, unhurt, with a medal around my neck. That's all I ask for. Normal programming resumes after... Or at least, healing and recovery.

In addition though, I wasn't mentally prepared for my 5 mile run that night - I just wanted to get it over with. I've been noticing, with longer runs, I haven't been as excited as I used to when I was just running 9 miles per week on average. I was happy, running a 5k here or there for the fun of it; now I'm afraid I might be getting a little burnt out with running. It's more of a chore than a stress-reliever, if that makes sense?

I have such a stubborn and determined drive, that I will not let this cause me to fail - I'm stronger than that, but this bump in the road has really knocked me on my ass. It's a blow to my gut, steel ovaries, and ego as I honestly sometimes forget I'm not Super Woman. I just want to get through this half marathon, complete my dream, and move on.

But with six weeks out to the Mini, I'm starting to wonder if I'll ever achieve this...

I honestly feel like I'm failing.

Thursday, March 13, 2014

I'm Only Human

I've fallen off the wagon.

Actually? It hit a bump, threw me off, backed up, and ran over me.

What can I say? I've ate like total sh*t lately. I've tried to clean it up, but I feel miserable. And guilty.

I really have tried, with good intention, but ya know that little thing I always mention about my stress eating? Times it by a zillion in the past few weeks.

I feel horrible. I feel disgusting. I'm stressed, emotional, and a total wreck, and I've ate like it too.

Not only have I used the excuse that "I'll be running tomorrow/tonight/next week/God knows when so have at it sister," today we laid my mother in law to rest after an incredibly stressful three weeks; three weeks I hope to never repeat again in my life.

So how bad has my eating got? Try six cookies for dinner Sunday night to the point I had a bellyache and couldn't sleep. What did I eat tonight, when all intents were to make a huge/yummy/leftover-veggie salad? A slice of banana bread and a split blueberry muffin with loads of honey butter.

I keep saying, "tomorrow is a new day," but for some reason, I don't believe myself. I've cheated myself, not only with food and calories, but I've made myself feel this way; the guilt, shame, and embarrassment because I've "let myself go." (Granted, I know it's only been three weeks, but come on. It's a slippery slope, folks.)

Yes, I've gained weight. Has it been much? No. Just 1.6 pounds, but I feel miserable. I can just tell the difference.

So my goal for this next week? Clean it up.

I'm not saying no more sweets, just sweets in moderation (not inhaling at the site of goodies). I'm a firm believe that moderation is okay; you absolutely cannot deprive yourself because it just makes it worse. I want to be able to have one or two sweet treats a week, but limit myself, as I know I feel much, much better when I'm eating better (in addition to running and working out).

I feel better about myself when I feel healthy. Since feeling better about myself was my resolution for 2014, I want to focus on it again. Get away from the crap, if you will.

In addition to all of the craziness Mr. K and I've faced in the past few weeks, one positive note is that I've kept with my half marathon training, as it's been a way for me to let go and de-stress. I've kept on schedule, and things are starting to take shape. I'm actually doing it! Ha! Who knew?!

I have officially ordered my second pair of running shoes, going with Brooks Ghost 6 again (which I love!), after finding out I should have replaced them a loooooong time ago. No wonder I've had calf soreness? #facepalm

While testing out new shoes (I also love the Newton Gravity's!) by running up and down the sidewalk like a madwoman running through town, I also picked up some nutrition to start giving it a shot. I'm at the point to where my long runs are now six miles or more lasting longer than an hour, and after running and bonking during 5 miles last week, it's time to start testing out what I like, what makes me sick, and what just won't work. This is a whoooooooole new adventure, folks.

Here's what I went with to test out first:


The gels are freaking me out a little, as I'm not crazy about the texture anyway, but I also picked up chews and sport beans to give them a shot. It's all about experimenting, seeing what works, what fuels me longer, and what just won't do.

In addition, this week's scheduled long run Saturday is 6 miles. At first, (because I'm a total dork and can't count on one hand to save my life), I had thought I was supposed to run a scheduled 10K or 7 miles this week. Well, that's next week. But conveniently, a local high school is hosting a 5k run/walk and 10k run, benefiting one of their student clubs. Why not, right? I do plan to take some nutrition with me, as I want to test it out at about mile 4 or 45 minutes in to running, whichever comes first. (It just won't be a gel. I don't want to get sick in front of people I know!)

I've also reached out to a few runner-friends and acquaintances from the community who I know have ran half marathons or full marathons before. I've had lots of wonderful advice shared with me, including tips about nutrition, tips about the Mini itself, tips about not eating Bengay (when thinking it's an energy gel, tips about getting clothes from clearance racks to shed/donate to charity when dressing in layers the day of the race, while also making sure I shed my earbuds shortly before entering Indianapolis Motor Speedway to hear bagpipers along the route. Knowing cheerleading squads cheering your name (listed on your bib), bands, bagpipers, and amazing volunteers will line the entire 13.1 mile route, while participating in not only one of the biggest half marathons in the nation, causes me to have instant goosebumps. You name it, it's all been passed on to me, and I am extremely grateful for the wealth of information leading up to race day! With this being my first half, I'm nervous, as expected, since it's pretty much fear of the unknown. I'm trying to do my best to prep for the race, and even though I'm nervous, I'm also very excited.

Closer to race day, I'll also have more information available, usually about the week before, regarding social media, race details, maps, etc. I plan to register both my Twitter account and Facebook information so that family, friends, and acquaintances can follow along during my race via automatic updates from my bib chip. What did we ever do before technology?! (This makes me geek out because I can't wait for you all to share in my progress too!)

In addition, I've also set my three personal goals for the race:
  • Finish. (AKA: Don't die.)
  • Stay off the trail bus. (Picking up anyone over the required 18 min/mile pace.)
  • Kiss some bricks ;)
The 500 Festival Mini Marathon is officially just 50 days away and counting!

Friday, February 28, 2014

Five Things Friday

Soooooooooo, I'm stealing yet another blog post topic idea from Dacia at My Roots To Grow... (I'm sorry I keep copycatting, Dacia! You're just so awesome, and I love the topic ideas you post about!)

It's Friday, it's the weekend, and I'm putting a truly crazy week behind me.

1. This Week

It's been a crazy, up, down, emotional, all around insane week. I can't explain it, (I don't really want to personally) but just know that I am ok. Stressed, but ok. I also want to thank everyone who has reached out with support that they have while allowing me to vent, take out frustration, cry, cheer, or whatever other form of support you showed me. I can't begin to describe the awesome feeling it is to know what support system I have around Mr. K and I. I appreciate it so, so, so much.


2. Meet the Mini-K's!



I'll be the first to admit that I'm a total nerd, but Mr. K's birthday was yesterday, and my gift to him?

A Mini-Mr. K.

I may or may not have taken inspiration from one of my favorite IndyCar drivers, Pippa Mann, and Little Pippa, whom travels with "Big Pippa" throughout her travels and racing adventures. Mini Ashley and Mini Mr. K were adopted all the way from Poland, (Lego's headquarters), joining in on our crazy lives and adventures. Think 'Flat Stanley' Legos...

I love Legos. I always have, but it's seriously either funny or a concern that as an adult, I'm taking enjoyment in showing the Mini-K's around. They've already started getting into a little mischief...

I can't wait to take them with me (or specifically Mini-Ash) on my upcoming travels.

Mini-Ashley even has her own Brooks Laich jersey, rocking the red in support of the Washington Capitals.



3. Winter. Can you just cut the crap, Mother Nature?



We're officially under a three-loaf warning. I'm never a fan of winter or being cold anyway, but it's been a winter full of record breaking snowfalls, and we're expecting yet another winter storm this Sunday. Me? I won't lie, I am hoping for a "snow day" where I work Monday, however I'm not holding out hope. We're expecting anywhere from 6-10 or 8-12 inches of snow (depending on who you ask), and I'm just done with it. I'm ready to run outside, in the warm sunshine, and Mother Nature can just STAHP.


Also, I do want to wish safe travels to family coming in from California next week. I hope you like snow? ;)

Seriously though, anyone and everyone involved or in the line of fire with this weekend's winter storm, please stay safe. It's officially a Three Loaf/French Toast Warning!

4. Five Miles

I find this fitting on Five Things Friday... I run my first five miles tomorrow. I haven't actually put anything more than 4.5 together since before knee surgery in December, but I'm a little nervous. I swear I have treadmill-ADD, and I usually can't focus much past 3 miles when utilizing equipment to run inside. I honestly hate the "dreadmill," and I just can't wait to get outside to run. The wildlife, fresh air, and, traffic, gawkers, people make it much, much more interesting to me.


I hope I'm not speaking too soon, but the half-marathon plan I'm using to train for the One-America 500 Festival Mini Marathon is actually going rather well, and it's honestly not killing me. I'm stoked! (I just hope I didn't speak too soon...)

This is the plan I'm following.. It's a 16-week training plan from PopSugar, and with completing Couch to 5k at around 9 miles a week, I was able to jump in on Week 6 of 16, putting me right at 10 weeks to go for the Mini on May 3. (I'm still thinking, "What did I really sign up for?")


 

5. This:


I hope you all have a wonderful, safe, and happy weekend!

-AK